Monday, February 9, 2015

Once upon a time ... We held hands

Okay, tell me I'm not the only one, but sometimes before I could fall asleep, I'll lie in bed and read through our Whatsapp history, and smile at the cute little moments we shared. And I never get tired of telling people how we first held hands or how we first kissed. I actually secretly wish people will ask me so I can tell the stories all over again like they have never been told before. Unfortunately though, I've already told the story to everyone who cared to ask or listen, hahaha. So now, it's time to write them down.

So ! *clears throat* I'm going to tell you about how we first held hands, hehehehe. 

We had been seeing each other for a while then, but none of us made the move to hold hands. Normally, Frank is not a very shy person. He's very outgoing, confident, and sociable. But with me, especially in the beginning, he was really really shy, and I find that super adorable. It was obvious that we had immediate romantic feelings for each other, but physically, we progressed really slowly.

The beginning of our relationship reminded me so much of high school, in a good way. We talked on the phone for hours, met up so spontaneously just because we missed each other, even though we just parted the night before, went to explore the city together like it's new, etc. Typing these now, I can still feel the butterflies and excitement I had back then, it was truly so so cute.

We first held hands in a movie theater, typical, I know. Unfortunately I've forgotten which movie we watched. How could I ! But I do remember, it was an experience:

Well, another reason why it took us so long to just hold hands, in addition to the fact that he was super shy, was because I never really allowed that opportunity. I didn't want to progress too quickly physically while we were still lacking deeper internal connections. Hello, I'm a 90 year old conservative grandma. So during that time, whenever we walked side by side, I always made a cautious effort to hold my purse on his side. When we sat down, I always made sure my hands were placed at somewhere not easily approachable. And that day, I thought, the time is now !

Dengdengdeng, so I placed my hand on my legs, at a reasonable proximity to his, all free for grabs hahaha. But it was already close to the middle of the movie and he hadn't made any move. And I was so nervous all by myself waiting for that moment to come.

THENNNNNN, the man moved. He first moved his arm onto the armrest, with his hand dangling out at the end. He held that pose for 5 mins. I had no idea what he wanted to do. Did he just want to switch an arm position or is he slowly approaching me ? For that entire 5 mins, I kept guessing if he would hold my hand next. Maybe that's why I can't remember which movie it was because I wasn't concentrating the entire time !

THENNNNNNNNN, the man moved again ! He moved his arm under the armrest, and placed it right next to mine, with the side/pinky of his hand touching mine a tiny little bit. He held that pose for another 5 mins or so. I'm not even exaggerating the time here, and if any, I might even have shortened them. This man was seriously moving like he was existing in another dimension where he felt like it was only a couple seconds but it was actually ten years earth time. What could I do ? I was just frozen there too ! I didn't want to make any tiny movement that might frighten that hand away. It was like having a butterfly (or dragonfly, more manly) landed on my hand and I was afraid to move an inch. So both of ours hands were frozen on the same spot till the man finally made the next move.

And nooooooooo, his next move was still just a bridging step!!! But it was a progress. He put his hand on top of mine ! Like, on. the. top. of my hand. Like, cupping it. This entire time we had no eye contact, no conversation, no other movement, just him making his steps and me feeling them, all so nervously. So as he was cupping my hand awkwardly for the longest time ever, my phone vibrated in my purse. I bent down to take a look and it was exactly then he finally took my hand and held it like a regular couple - the finger-interlocked type.

Cue : awwwwwwwwwwwww and clap.

Phrew. I know right ?

He looked into my eyes right after, and gave me a " is this okay ? " kind of permission asking look. And I just smiled. And we've been holding hands happily ever after. The End.

What I love about holding hands with him now is during our sleeps. I love how he automatically holds my hand whenever I place my hand close to his, even when he has fallen asleep soundly :)

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